Editorial Intern Sought – Unpaid (New York)
Reply to: job-yeah-right-1255781602@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Date: 2009-07-06, 11:54AM EDT
GazillionBazillions (www.gazbaz.moc), the leading financial, political, and scientific blog site, is in search of two talented editorial interns for the summer.
Responsibilities:
- Provide administrative support for the department/division such as answering telephones, selling advertising, and filling in when the most experienced staff fail to show up.
- Bring order to our filing “bucket,” a large bin where we’ve been throwing important documents since our company’s inception.
- Provide helpdesk solutions for our overpaid, under-educated staff
- Make executive-level decisions about the direction of the company. Must be willing to accept responsibility to shareholders for said decisions.
- Repair drywall/Remove water stains
- Throw rose petals (self supplied) in the wake of our CEO, while never treading on his shadow
Requirements:
- A steady hand
- Must currently be a student
- College degree required (Masters or PH.D. preferred)
- 18 1/2 years of professional writing, editing, and tap-dancing experience at a major newspaper or magazine
- Must have flexible morality/be willing to break the law
- Intimate knowledge of quantum mechanics and/or molecular biology
- Proficiency with Mac, Windows, Unix, Linux, ENIAC, and Kremvax
- Must be available to work no fewer than 60 hours/week
- Ability to levitate a big plus.
Candidates fluent in Mandarin & Cantonese will be considered first.
Please send us a short paragraph about why you want this internship as well as a proposed solution to the Hodge Conjecture (no longer than 140 characters, plz) to the e-mail above.
* Compensation: Unpaid (Meal stipend possible)
* This is an internship “job”
* Principals only. Recruiters, please don’t contact this job poster.
* Please, no phone calls about this job!
* Please do not contact job poster about other services, products or commercial interests.
Popularity: 3% [?]
Tags: corporate life, craigslist, drywall, internship, satire, social critique