Caveat: I am a terrible writer. I am also a bastard.
Dear _____,
After reading your story, I’ll give you some blunt advice. Your story needs to be re-written. It feels like a first draft and is not ready for publishing. That said, it’s not unsalvageable. Here are a few things you need to do:
Popularity: 7% [?]
Hey, kids, if you haven’t heard, my buddy Dave Colon is putting out issue 2 of Stretch magazine, his own home-grown literary mag. Yours truly has submitted an original piece of terrible fiction, along with a few other Trader Joe’s writers.
We’re holding a launch party on Thursday, December 16th at WORD in Greenpoint at 7 p.m. Free beer, free readings, and free copies of the magazine. Come on by and check it out if your in the borough.
Popularity: 9% [?]
A year ago I ordered A Distant Mirror
It sat on my shelf for ten months. First I ignored it: it was a foolish, impulsive purchase. Then I rationalized it: I didn’t have time for a huge commitment, and, besides, I knew nothing about the 1300s. I’d be lost reading it an probably wouldn’t enjoy it.
Popularity: 11% [?]
Sadly another month without regular internet at home. No matter. I’ve been on a book-buying binge ever since I found a Salvation Army and a used book store within walking distance of my flat; this is dangerous for a bibliophile like me. I knew I hit rock-bottom when I bought an obscure Umberto Ecco novel from a dodgy man in Union Square. Who knows what I could have caught!
Popularity: 6% [?]
A thought process which occurred to me in the sixth hour of data-entry at my temp job:
Popularity: 2% [?]
Writing letters to your elected representatives is a uniquely American pastime. When all else fails, we hold on to the belief that a well-crafted plea will influence decisions at the highest level of government. Perhaps you may have read about a recent bill that strikes a chord with your sensibilities. If only you could just lay out the reasons why you believe in it, you could convince your congressperson that it’s a worthwhile measure. Perhaps a syndicated talk show host has roused righteous indignation in your heart and, by God, you’ll let Madame Senator know your staunch opposition to some affront on our social mores.
This quaint idea that contacting a senator means being heard somehow persists in our age. True governmental change is purchased and promoted through think tanks, influential insiders, and lobbyists with bottomless pockets. But to all the hopeful romantics out there who think a letter-writing campaign can bring some change, I offer a guide compiled from my limited experience in the halls of state government. Here are ten things that will ensure your letter goes from the clammy hands of some bored, clock-watching bureaucrat to the lofty desk of your chosen leader.
Happy writing!
Popularity: 15% [?]
According to the Washington Post*, the National Endowment for the Arts has announced that
“[f]or the first time since the NEA began surveying American reading habits in 1982 — and less than five years after it issued its famously gloomy ‘Reading at Risk’ report — the percentage of American adults who report reading ‘novels, short stories, poems or plays’ has risen instead of declining: from 46.7 percent in 2002 to 50.2 percent in 2008.”
Before you get so excited about the general populous picking up poetry, this category also includes romance novels and loads of other “light reading.” In addition, reading overall is down. People who read any book outside of school or work is down 2.3% to 54.2%.
It’s shocking that nearly half of the country doesn’t read any books that aren’t forced upon them (including not reading to their children, I suppose). How did we get to this state?
Speaking of which, I need to get the hell of the internet and finish Bryon‘s Down Under.
*They had to get in an extra mention of Obama in a totally unrelated article. If you read the style section today, way more than half of the articles mentioned him. I don’t seem to recall that kind of presidential coverage in early 2001.
Popularity: 24% [?]
